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012903

 

O'Brien, OR

Wednesday January 29, 2003

                   Okay, it's already the next morning. It's the morning of the twenty ninth of January. It's about seven forty. I just woke up and I took my sawdust shit. It's weird. Well anyway, I didn't record that much last night. Mainly because I didn't have time. I was around people all night and I feel real stupid talking into my cassette recorder around other people. Afterwards, I had gone to Fawn's because I was hungry. I sat in her kitchen and talked with Jocelyn while Fawn fried me up some potatoes. Umm, I'll tell you about Jocelyn in a minute. She's this twenty one year old chick who lives out here. I'll tell you about her later.
                   Let's see, what else did I do? Oh, I helped Dave too. He needed me to hold a ladder while he climbed up on top of the structure they had built around Fawn's trailer. He was fitting a stove pipe in mom's porch/den which is all enclosed in plastic. Shadow, the Vietnam Vet who owns the property had built the porch for her. I was just helping as much as I could. Later on, afterwards, I went back to Jody's and told him what's going on and everything. I smoked a cigarette at Jody's and listened to my Weezer tape. Then I went to Shadow's barn. Shadow lives on the second floor of the barn. Tons of room up there. There are blankets hanging from the ceiling separating rooms. He's got some pretty nice amenities up there. It's just a cool little hangout. There's couches and he's got satellite TV. Everybody's always smoking weed too which is awesome! I went up there and got stoned. It was just perfect. They even fed me this yummy macaroni with beef. It was damn good. This is the second time I had been up there.

                   Last night I watched this cool show with them, I can't remember the name. It was cool though. Umm, it had the guy from MacGyver in it. I forgot what it was called. It was really cool. Last night they had a badass movie on called Volcano. It's about this city that's in danger of being drowned in lava. They have to save Los Angeles from being flooded with all this lava. They had this part where the lava flow was coming through the subway. There was a train stopped and people were evacuating out of the rear. The lava hadn't gotten to the back of the train yet. Well, the last guy left asked everyone where the driver of the train was, but nobody knew. Well, he darted to the cockpit of the train and comes out carrying the unconscious driver. When he gets to the exit in the rear the lava is already covering the ground in front of the back of the train. He pauses, thinks for a minute then while still holding the driver in his arms, jumps. At the arc of his jump he throws the driver to safety and lands in the lava and dies. Wow, that was pretty courageous of him. I know it's only a movie, but I was stoned and it was pretty cool. Huh huh huh.

                   Towards the end of last night I started craving some peanuts. Now, the first day I was there, when I went and hung out in Jody's bus, he told me that Shadow had boxes of peanuts under his barn. They were like, shit I forgot what they call them. You know, military food. So, I asked Shadow if he could show me where the peanuts were. Shadow seemed pretty hesitant to show me were they were. I told him not to worry about it, that I would go get Jody and he could show me. I started going downstairs to go get Jody and Shadow told me he would get them for me. Shadow went downstairs.

                   Before, when I was about to leave to get Jody to show me where the peanuts were, Jocelyn, Dave and Boone said, "Oh, you're leaving, Victor?" I told them, "Well I was, but now that Shadow is going to get them for me I guess I'll stay." Shadow had already gone downstairs and didn't hear me say that. But, when I went downstairs to get the peanuts from Shadow, he hands them to me and tells me, "Well, you have a good night, Victor." So I guess I am leaving Shadow's for the night.
                   I left and I went to Jody's bus. I wasn't tired and I was just going to hang out. I hung out at Jody's and he let me smoke a cigarette. It was cool. I played my tape a little bit and came back over to my trailer. I didn't have any trouble getting to sleep. I thought I'd stay awake because I slept so much earlier at my healing.

                   Okay, let me tell you about Jocelyn. I met Jocelyn the second day I was here while I was helping with the kitchen. She's twenty one and lives with Boone in his double-decker bus. They are lovers, so Jody told me. At first I wasn't too attracted to her, but the more I talked to her the more attractive she became. We are of the same generation and it turns out we think almost exactly alike. Get this, she's writing a book like me too. We were so similar. I never thought I would meet someone my age up in this mountain. She's just cool. Now, I don't know if I would want a relationship with her because she's Boone's lover supposedly. I don't want to cause any friction out here. But, yesterday when I was at Fawn's eating, Jocelyn was there. We were talking about all the similarities we share. Then Fawn told her how the spirits had told her all these nice things about me like that I'm a beam of light and that my purpose here was to bring balance to the world. I was totally freaked out when Fawn told me this. It seems like I'm supposed to be here. Well anyway, Jocelyn said something that I'm not too sure how to interpret. She said the spirits had told her stuff about me too, but she couldn't tell me. She grinned when she said that. I pleaded with her to tell me, but she refused. She told me it was nothing bad, still grinning. I don't know. That may have been a hint to there being some reciprocation in my attraction to her, even though she's with Boone. Or maybe not. I'm not sure what she could have meant by that. I don't know. I mean, it would be kind of cool if I could start a relationship with her. Now, I still want to return to San Antonio to type up my book, so maybe not.
                   Now, I had mentioned to Jocelyn that I wanted a traveling partner and she told me that she used to travel with this guy once for two years and that they had gone everywhere. So, I'm thinking I might hold off and go back to San Antonio and try to get a girl from home to come traveling with me. Well, that was a huge recap right there. I should really be conserving this tape, I only have one.

                   Okay, for a couple days now I've been brushing my teeth without any toothpaste, but I think I'm going to use some right now. Now, I've always had some toothpaste, but when I brushed them without they still ended up feeling slick when I passed my tongue over my teeth. To tell you the truth, I think toothpaste might be a hoax, hehe. You can just brush them without toothpaste and they would still get clean. You can always pop in a mint or something for your breath. I mean, how did people get their teeth clean before toothpaste was invented? Shit, I don't know.

                   ***This is the point where I have a huge gap in my logging.  Unfortunately, I got my rucksack, containing my un-typed microcassettes stolen in LA on 5-14-03.  My return back to San Antonio is chronicled in my Odyssey story.***

Next day..

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