042607

                                                                                                            Portland, OR

Thursday April 26, 2007

     12:20pm  This is the continuation of a tape I lost. Big nine day gap. I walked over to Jeni's this morning and read my book on the front step for about an hour and a half. I didn't want to wake her up. Right now I cleaned up. I cleaned the kitchen and the living room. Swept even. I didn't do the dishes though. I cleaned up and took a nap. I'm walking to work. Walking to my office again on the corner.

     12:35pm  Dude, I just totally got blessed right now! I didn't get a courtesy ride. That's why I kept walking. It's such a beautiful day today. I was walking up Foster Road a little bit, right where they're doing some construction on some building, I saw something in the little crevice between the new sidewalk and the building. It looked like a sandwich in a Ziploc bag. Oh shit, that might still be good. I just groundscored me a badass croissant turkey breast sandwich. It was delicious. I was hungry too. I was wondering where I was going to eat breakfast today, hehe. I had some leftover pizza crust at Jenny's house when I was cleaning. I scored me a big sandwich. I am so full. I'm going to sit down in this little corner and smoke a cigarette and smoke some weed.

     12:44pm  I am all loaded up and ready to go. I've got my purse on my back. I need to take a picture of myself. I look cool. Oh yeah, I didn't get to tell you, but last night I got to tell Melissa's twelve year old daughter Quinn my story in Sandy. I had seen Brian and Melissa at 4-20 at the park and they said I could come over and hang out for a night.  She listened to a lot of it. She's a beautiful little girl. That's weird. I'm all the way over on Woodstock. I don't remember turning on Woodstock. I'm over here close to 83rd. Maybe Chris will be working in the garden.

     12:57pm  I just got to Foster Road and 82nd. I'm going to keep walking to Powell.

     1:10pm  The nice driver who gave me a ride yesterday is hooking me up again. I appreciate it, brother. Everybody gets credit, thanks.

     5:34pm  It's weird, I haven't made an update. I came over to Powell and flew my sign for a little. I came over to talk to Miranda this black girl who lived in the motel close to my corner. She was all tweaking on drugs and she couldn't listen to my story. I was flying my sign and Justin Danjer showed up. I'll show you the emails:


Date: Sun, 22 Apr 2007 10:52:15 -0700
From: "Justin Danjer" <j.danjer@gmail.com
To: iamsanantonio@yahoo.com
Subject: You've done it
Hello Victor,

Let me start off by saying thank you for sharing your story. We met in Mt. Tabor park on 420, how appropriate. My name is Justin and I am Danjer. I believe you have been looking for me for some time now...a catalyst of catalysts! I believe in you. I've been reading almost all of your content you have posted on you website. You said your army consists of 6000 people who soak up your words and ideas, consider it 6001. You've told me a lot about you, now let me introduce myself.

I am a full blown Hip Hop activist. Not in the bling bling get some hoes type, but more the ring ring I'm at yo' door type! I heard the calling from Tupac, Bob Marley, KRS-One and many of the other riots to pass through my culture. I make beats with pirated software and think that everyone in the world should have the right to do the same. I recently moved out to Portland from Wisconsin where I organized an all ages outdoor Hip Hop festival that was free for the public...all funded by local businesses. I've been staying with my uncle's family for the past 3 months and I recently started a job land surveying which has me on the road in a Washington hotel room. Since meeting you, I've considered quitting the job that very day but I have made a commitment to my employer upon getting hired that I would finish out this 3 month long project. I will be parting ways with them once this tenure is done and I plan to do so on good terms. I figure if I can walk away from a supporting job that I enjoy, then it must be for the right reason.

I have heard of and believed in the revolution for quite some time now but it was seeing you, the revolution in person, that flipped the switch...this is what I must do. I have a gift, I am able to open my mind and speak more fluently than I ever thought possible...all in rhyme. A freestyle revolutionary/rapper of sorts. I have a 4 year degree in marketing but I've refused to join the system. Although I've went through their production factory, I've held onto the truths first passed down to me by my father. Despite graduating with honors in the devil's craft, I've learned how the system works...at the most basic consumer mindstate level. I've rebeled against all my professors I've had and most of them have loved me for it. I've given speeches on "Losing the Drug War" and the power of Hip Hop to move masses. I've written a paper in conjuction with my professor/mentor on Hip Hop and marketing which is published in an online textbook. I have a small army of revolutionaries whom I am tight with and that I can trust to help with this peaceful revolution. They range from college professors to pastors to political activists (working in the system) as well as many revolutionary potheads I've came across in my day. They are waiting on me.

The key is support, you already know this. One man talking can't do shit but the thousands/millions (eventually billions) listening can and will stand up for the truth. You will need the support of people at all levels of the social ladder...starting with the bottom. If you have the support of the masses, the powers will eventually respondI always felt as though if there were no problems in the world today, I would not have to take Hip Hop so seriously but it is what it is. I'm sure you would not be so driven if you utopia was present, it would simply be a time to relax and enjoy life. Now is the time to enjoy life, but not a time to relax. You've contacted me and I am answering your call. Consider me part of your effort. You've given me a gift and a curse depending on which way you look at it...I say thank you for the gift. It is a new way of life for me and the rest of humanity.

We will speak again...hopefully sooner than later. I would like to meet you in person as it is safer this way. I know you are ready to die for "The Cause" but it is not time. I would like to inform you that if you ever waver on your stance in a way that gives "The Cause" a bad name by letting your ego get the best of you...I'll fucking kill you. This is a symbolic statement but do not take this lightly. I'm not here to console you in times of need, that is God's job. I'm not here to feed or house you, that is the job of the wealthy. I am the messenger who will push "The Cause" to the next level. I'm ready to join your fight.

Let me know how long you're in Portland. I am back here every weekend. If you are still around, I would love to meet up and discuss business. Another option is to meet on the road in a city we both happen to be in. I will be in Cincinatti for the annual Scribble Jam festival where you should meet me. This is the largest underground Hip Hop festival in the U.S. Check out myspace.com/scribblejam. I hope you're ready to finish what you started.

Peace Brother. We shall talk soon.

1 Love

Justin Danjer



Here's my reply:

Hi Justin,

Just doing my job, bro. Believe me, I have
played with the idea of forming a fellowship. I will
consider anyone's suggestion. I am not closeminded at
all. But in the end I am playing this game by my
rules. I am the only one I can really trust. I(my
site) will just serve as the truth-collecting portal.
I'll let everybody else do their thing, link them on
my site...and let them share in my global voice.
I am well aware that my stuff may come off as
self-centered or self-aggrandizing. I am just playing
a role. I guess you can look at it as the world's
healthiest ego-trip.
Do you have any of your hip hop in digital
format(mp3)? If you do you could give it away on my
site. Or maybe just lyrics. Do you have your stuff
documented? Typed up? Email them over and help me
educate the masses.
As far as my schedule goes, if you don't plan
things you don't get let down. I tend to just let
thigs happen. I always have a general direction, at
least. It's good to be free. I have been in Portland
for a month, waiting for signs to leave. All I am
getting are signs to stay. I could do so much work in
this town.
I don't know if I told you, but I've been playing
the undercover-bum role hardcore, on 82nd and Powell,
with all the other homebums. I'm not asking for money
or nuthin. One side of my signs says WORLD PEACE
THROUGH MARIJUANA and the other says HAVETHISBOOK.COM.
I've been flying there for weeks. I have a
pocketload of little papers with my url and I offer
them to the cars, "Will you check out my website?
It's free. It's not religious, I promise." I getting
such a great reaction form everybody. When they
ignore me or tell me no to my url I yell, "Damn,
NOBODY wants world peace!" Hehe, I have fun with it.
My stuff is spreading like wildfire.
Oh yeah, and a couple weeks ago this guy saw my
sign and later on that day I get an email with
subject: Interview with KBOO. I'm going to be on the
radio, if I want to. Still contemplating not. I don't
know. I could be, if I waned to. That's what's
important, hehe.

Alrigt bro, check you later. Let me know what's up.

- Victor Antonio

Justin again:

Date: Mon, 23 Apr 2007 00:06:41 -0700
From: "Justin Danjer" <j.danjer@gmail.com>
To: "victor antonio" <iamsanantonio@yahoo.com>
Subject: Re: You've done it
 

Victor,
I have the utmost respect for what you are doing and you have inspired me to plan my own venture. You can only share so much knowledge and the rest needs to be learned by experience. You playing by your own rules is the ONLY way this will work. If you try too hard to organize, you become one of "them." The way I see it, if this is going to be successful, more need to take part in the action. Supporting the ideas only goes so far, like you said, people need to back up what they know to be right...no matter how much it goes against the norms. In my mind I've supported "The Cause" for quite some time and felt very much alone in my viewpoints for quite some time and you have inspired me to act on what I believe.

My quest will be one along the same lines as yours. I will do my own dance. I will have my own website. I will not forget who showed me the light. You don't need a fellowship, it will hinder your effectiveness and the idea of free open information allows anyone to run thier own life. I love how you give credit to original authors on your website rather than rewriting the material as yours. Big ups for that...much more effective. Several ideas have come to mind such as creating a network of homeless shelters, hostels, churches, cozy bridges, and possibly even an anonymous listing of "friends of the cause." This would enable people like me to hit the road with more confidence in what lies ahead and allow for more people to do good by supporting messengers of "The Cause." Maybe that would go against "having faith in humanity's generousity" but what it would do is blow the lid on how to experience it for yourself. I don't need that for my personal journey but if you could prove how easy it would be, then more will take part. I would like to meet with you in person sometime for further discussion on actions that need to be taken. If we aren't working together, WE aren't working!

I noticed your myspace barely cracked a hundred friends...this is the most powerful networking tool out there...you best believe I will be using that to my advantage with my travels. You tube! I searched for you on youtube and nothing. I would love to come down to powell and 82nd or wherever you are at when we can find a time to meet and if you would like, I have a video camera you could use if you want. Your story needs to be told and available for viewing...the internet is ready, are you? I do not want any credit whatsoever for the filming or posting of this...I just want people to go to your website and read. Let me know what you think about this idea.

I have a mass amount of Hip Hop knowledge, mostly of the revolutionary sort, and I will be compiling a soundtrack that has helped shape my philosophical stance. As far as my own music goes, I have a few tracks written but not recorded yet. I am more of a freestyle artist where I seem to go into a trance of rhyme and it only really works when I'm speaking the truth. Your cause is something that will fill the breaks of my art for years to come. I've already started a track titled titled, "Victor Antonio (from San Antonio)." You are a catalyst! I'll get you some lyrics soon.

If you truly believe in your cause, I see no reason why you wouldn't do the interview with KBOO. They will let you say anything you want to a mass audience...imagine the possibilities. The media can be your friend. Corporations can help you...keep your friends close and your enemies closer. The more people who support the cause, the more credibility you will gain...the more credibility you gain, the more the masses will agree with you! This is the circle you must run on if your job is to be complete. I do not think your crazy, actually you are probably the most sane person I have ever met. I've been pumping your website to all my friends back home and they are with you. The world is with you, they are ready!

Please feel free to email me if you ever need a meal, a ride, a place to stay, money, some bud, or just someone to talk to. You are one of the few of us that are not crazy. The clarity I've felt lately is unmatched by any other mindstate I've experienced...and that's not the weed talkin'! Peace till next time my friend. I'll be back in Portland next Friday and I hope we can find time to chat.

1Love

Justin Danjer

                    Anyway, Victor again. Justin is out there standing with a video camera taping me walking up and down the sidewalk. I told him the first half of my story, all the way up to where I start the Odyssey, in front of the Pizza Hut. He smoked me out too, thanks, brother. I asked him if he wanted to go to Alberta with me, to the coffee shop. It's Last Thursday. We're going to go check this out.

                    Justin is going to bust out with some freestyle. Justin: "I feel like I'm talking to a revolutionary, cuz I'm not sure if it's right, but what you do is scary. And that's a good thing. People want to sing in this nation and you're going to give them that voice. People all trying to make noise, but not really say shit. Dude, the other day, you almost made my job go quit. Fuck, I went in there and just started laughing. It looked like a bunch of monkeys runnin' around having a spasm. Do this, get that number, crunch this shit. All I could think in my head was revolution. I couldn't get it out, man. I wanted to run. Grab the finish line and say yo, the war is won. So I sadly sit back and look at the sun. It's like damn, that light's only bright in that way that's one. Because it needs to shine all over. We all can't waste our lives on that four leaf clover hoping for a lotto ticket. So fuck it, I'm placing the biggest bet of all. I'm giving my life. And Victor, man. You an inspiration to everybody who wants to do it right. And that's a thank you from the hip-hop generation. You're the one that will lead this revolution, man. I hope that you tastin', cuz sometimes [didn't understand it right there] that's when comes the final hour. Peace."

     8:03pm  Man, I'm having a good time. Oh yeah, it's Last Thursday. It was awesome how Justin picked me up on 82nd.

     10:24pm  Scott, it's Last Thursday on Alberta Street. I am having a blast. Scott just kicked me down some nuggets. I appreciate it, brother. Everybody gets credit, thanks.

     10:26pm  I am having such a good time at Last Thursday. Some guy just hooked me up with some weed right in front of the cops. I wonder if they're going to tell me shit. I don't know.

     11:19pm  Man, it was so magical how I ended up on Alberta tonight. I didn't realize it was Last Thursday tonight. There's this big huge crowd dancing in the street. They have loudspeakers blaring. I'm standing here on 24th. Right across from Star E. Rose. The person's lawn on this corner is higher than sidewalk level, so it's like I'm up here on stage and the crowd is down below. I quickly pulled out my WPTMJ sign and I'm holding it up high, jamming to the music. Dude, everybody's going to go to my webpage. Everybody is going to recognize me. I'm going to find somebody right now to tell my story to. Hell yeah, I'm stoned.

                      Marijuana is the key, hehe.

     12:19am  What a magical night I had tonight, man. Hell yeah. I just had me a big audience who just listened to my entire Odyssey right now.

     12:37am  I walked over to Karen's house. There's a party here tonight. I'm sure there's people who saw me tonight.

                      Ahh, I left that party. I just made a quick appearance and booked it.

     12:47am  I saw this guy with a big hookah in his front lawn. I thought he was going to smoke it. I hit him up for my story and he said, "Yeah, I am in the business of listening." This dude actually thought it was human nature to be greedy. Man, nobody wants world peace, hehe.

                      Oh yeah, when I offered this guy my webpage he denied it saying, "Oh, I prefer to be off the grid, blah, blah, blah." I told him, "Well, then you should've let me finish tell you my story. If listening was your business, then you're going bankrupt. Ignorance is bliss, they say. I gotta go. I hate wasting my time."

      12:54am  I just walked up to Killingsworth and 33rd. Dude, on this bench in front of Hot Lips I found a box with all these badass leftover pizzas! I benchscored big time! They're huge slices. Cool, I get to bring food back to the house. Let me check the schedule at the bus stop and see what time it comes. Twelve fifty five, fuck I might've missed the last bus. Oh wait, that's on Sunday, whew. I still might've missed the last bus. Oh, not I didn't. Fuck, I did! It comes at twelve fifty one. Shit! There it is right there!

Next day..