RE: Island Paradises of Panama
franklin gruber <botanicogruber@hotmail.com>
Thu 6/10/2010 5:51 PM
Hello
Victor, thanks for the update on your situation. Unless something
dramatic happens here financially I do not think I can send you the
money any time real soon to come here. However, where we can work
together on now is in the exchange of ideas preparing for your exit from
" modern civilization."
The first thing I believe you need is to make a writen inventory of what work you can and connot do. You typè well, can do computer work, however, you have been on your own for so long it may be hard for you to follow instructions on a job...do another persons will even if your paid. Believe it or not Victor, I went through much of what you are going through. Its only by doing your own thing, finding that thing or things you like to do for others that gains you income which can make us tolerably happy and help our self esteem.
Much of the US is THE RAT RACE. I stepped out of it because it was ruining my health. I can help you step out of it too but we need that exchange of ideas...brainstorming. There is always a way out Victor, but it requires a plan and some times some patience.
Will get back to you in one or two days. I am currently here at an internet service redoing the publicity for my product only limiting it to BUG APPLICATIONS. If it does too much people have difficulty believing that it does.
I need to internationalize my product so it can be sold anywhere easily. The new name will be THE BugBite DOCTOR. The search now is to find those beaches where a maximum of tourists collide with sand flies since that is what it is great at, removing the itch and allergy in 5 or 10 minutes. A bug attack can ruin a persons expensive vacation.
I am considering traveling to Florida some time in the future as it is full of lakes and beaches where bugs attack people mercilessly. Also will visit beaches in Panama closer to Panama city that tourists visit each day. All one needs to do is give a little free sample to those putting their nails into their skin. As soon as they feel the relief they buy the product. Beaches are full of beautiful blond blue eyed woman that need t his stuff, its a vehicle for conversation as well.
Well, the idea is to find a beach where one can sell at least 10 2 ounce bottles a day for 10 or 20 dollas and one has 100 to 200 dollars daily! Its a proven fact that my stuff works, only the market here in the mountain is too limited.
You will likely have better things to do in life but at least this can become a survival tool until those th ings materialize.
Consider googling GERMAN COLONIES IN SOUTH AMERICA. Germans emigrated 70 or more years into the Amazon... Brazil, Chile, Argentina in large numbers, they too where fed up with the value system of what today has become modern civilization. maybe you may find one that is appropriate for you. But beware of the bugs a lot of t hem along the way.
Make the inventory of what survival activities that m ake you some money you feel you can do and share it with me.
God Bless Victor, have to leave now, the internet service is closthing. Keep in touch daily if you wish! love your dad.
PS My respiratory allergies began in my early thirties, you may beome sensitive to the smog and pollution. One of the symptoms was depression. Pure oxigen and exercise is a medicine for depression.
From: rightprotect@hotmail.com
To: botanicogruber@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Island Paradises of Panama
Date: Mon, 7 Jun 2010 03:13:31 -0500
Franklin,
I truly hate it here at Ada's. She spoils my nephew so much. He does whatever he wants. He's got a huge ego because he works out and is in pretty good shape. Better shape than me. It's obvious who wears the pants in this house. He's as brainwashed as the rest and am sure he looks down on me.
I can't tell Ada that he walks all over her, like he does. She'll get offended and defensive because that implies that she lets him. I don't enjoy cleaing the house for her anymore, because I'm cleaning his mess too. He always says, "I can't because I'm at school all day," even though him going to school doesn't help the household. I had to do chores when I was in school. He doesn't do anything. Summer vacation just started for him and Ada and I won't have the house to myself all day anymore. I need to pack my bags and leave.
Ada wants me to get on medication. I told her I didn't want to be on their drugs and she says it's only to correct the imbalances in my brain. Living in society reminds me of why I dropped out. It's artificial and I can't handle it, knowing what I've learned in all my years free as a bird. I refuse to fall for the game like everyone else has. Living here makes me want to kill myself. I don't have the balls to kill myself though.
I went to the doctors to evaluate my disability situation. The tests the shrink gave me was telling me I did well at them, so I seriously doubt I'll get approved. Even if I did I wouldn't want to keep living here. It's sad, but being here enables me to do nothing. I am stuck going to bed at three or four and waking up at noon. I'm not blaming Ada, it's my own fault. I am ready to give up.
Very soon I plan to take off hitchhiking again and be homeless. First I'll be traveling north, because of the heat. I'm not going to rev up my mission again. My website expired and I did not renew it. No more world peace through marijuana for me. I failed. It never caught on like I expected it to. The shame I feel for stopping my mission is unbearable, but I've been off of it for nine months now, since last September when I came home. No one will believe my story now that I've been shot down for so long.
Everybody's brainwashed into believing in money and alas, I am alone in my ideals. A quote keeps running through my head, "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society."
I feel trapped by money and have absolutely no interest in being a slave in this society. I need to be free again. I won't have my mission to fall back on. I'll leave my walking stick here. I'm dropping the act. I'm going to be just another bum. I'll still hit up the Mexican restaurants, but instead I'll ask if I can do some work for them instead. I'll live the last few years I have left free like I used to be. Like I miss being. I know the end is near for me. I rather die than succumb to the evil system everybody has been fooled into following.
Maybe I'll find me a nice homeless girl, but I doubt it. I'm stupid and have no skills. I've wasted my life away on a pipe dream. No sex though. The very last thing I want is to get some girl pregnant. I wouldn't be able to handle the responsibility.
I'd like to go back and talk to that medicine woman in Oregon again and see what she tells me. What she told me about the spirits saying I was a beam of light for others to follow and me bringing balance to the world was my main motivator for going out there and telling my story. She did tell me to never stop documenting my life, but I quit a while back. I'm not proud of my life like I used to be. Last time I was in Oregon she refused to talk to me, so I now doubt her. I think she might have just been telling me what I wanted to hear from the beginning.
I don't know if I'll smoke marijuana again. Lately when I've smoked I almost have an anxiety attack because it opens my mind and I dwell on my pathetic situation. Maybe once I'm free again I'll be able to enjoy it again. I don't know. I truly miss being happy.
The island paradises in Panama seem breathtaking, but even if I were to go I would still be expected to get a job and slave away. I just don't belong in society, anywhere. Plus, you have a new family to take care of.
My itching has subsided. Maybe I never had scabies to begin with. Maybe it was just an allergic reaction. Maybe it's stopped because I've been able to take a shower every day. I'm still using sulphur soap, which also dries out your skin and can cause itching itself. Maybe when I'm out on the road again and not showering every day the itch will return. I don't know. I really hate myself here.
Blessings,
- Victor Antonio
From: botanicogruber@hotmail.com
To: rightprotect@hotmail.com
Subject: Island Paradises of Panama
Date: Fri, 4 Jun 2010 16:53:06 -0500
Victor learn more about our islands, please Google Isla Grande, Contadora, or just Islands of Panama. Explore the geography of the world in internet as a hobby. Any place the energy is right for you will cure your depression and there you shall find reasons for existing.
Search and ye shall find, there is a place for everyone under the sun. Love & Peace, Frank
Hotmail has tools for the New Busy. Search, chat and e-mail from your inbox. Learn more.
The New Busy think 9 to 5 is a cute idea. Combine multiple calendars with Hotmail. Get busy.
The New Busy is not the too busy. Combine all your e-mail accounts with Hotmail. Get busy.
The first thing I believe you need is to make a writen inventory of what work you can and connot do. You typè well, can do computer work, however, you have been on your own for so long it may be hard for you to follow instructions on a job...do another persons will even if your paid. Believe it or not Victor, I went through much of what you are going through. Its only by doing your own thing, finding that thing or things you like to do for others that gains you income which can make us tolerably happy and help our self esteem.
Much of the US is THE RAT RACE. I stepped out of it because it was ruining my health. I can help you step out of it too but we need that exchange of ideas...brainstorming. There is always a way out Victor, but it requires a plan and some times some patience.
Will get back to you in one or two days. I am currently here at an internet service redoing the publicity for my product only limiting it to BUG APPLICATIONS. If it does too much people have difficulty believing that it does.
I need to internationalize my product so it can be sold anywhere easily. The new name will be THE BugBite DOCTOR. The search now is to find those beaches where a maximum of tourists collide with sand flies since that is what it is great at, removing the itch and allergy in 5 or 10 minutes. A bug attack can ruin a persons expensive vacation.
I am considering traveling to Florida some time in the future as it is full of lakes and beaches where bugs attack people mercilessly. Also will visit beaches in Panama closer to Panama city that tourists visit each day. All one needs to do is give a little free sample to those putting their nails into their skin. As soon as they feel the relief they buy the product. Beaches are full of beautiful blond blue eyed woman that need t his stuff, its a vehicle for conversation as well.
Well, the idea is to find a beach where one can sell at least 10 2 ounce bottles a day for 10 or 20 dollas and one has 100 to 200 dollars daily! Its a proven fact that my stuff works, only the market here in the mountain is too limited.
You will likely have better things to do in life but at least this can become a survival tool until those th ings materialize.
Consider googling GERMAN COLONIES IN SOUTH AMERICA. Germans emigrated 70 or more years into the Amazon... Brazil, Chile, Argentina in large numbers, they too where fed up with the value system of what today has become modern civilization. maybe you may find one that is appropriate for you. But beware of the bugs a lot of t hem along the way.
Make the inventory of what survival activities that m ake you some money you feel you can do and share it with me.
God Bless Victor, have to leave now, the internet service is closthing. Keep in touch daily if you wish! love your dad.
PS My respiratory allergies began in my early thirties, you may beome sensitive to the smog and pollution. One of the symptoms was depression. Pure oxigen and exercise is a medicine for depression.
From: rightprotect@hotmail.com
To: botanicogruber@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Island Paradises of Panama
Date: Mon, 7 Jun 2010 03:13:31 -0500
Franklin,
I truly hate it here at Ada's. She spoils my nephew so much. He does whatever he wants. He's got a huge ego because he works out and is in pretty good shape. Better shape than me. It's obvious who wears the pants in this house. He's as brainwashed as the rest and am sure he looks down on me.
I can't tell Ada that he walks all over her, like he does. She'll get offended and defensive because that implies that she lets him. I don't enjoy cleaing the house for her anymore, because I'm cleaning his mess too. He always says, "I can't because I'm at school all day," even though him going to school doesn't help the household. I had to do chores when I was in school. He doesn't do anything. Summer vacation just started for him and Ada and I won't have the house to myself all day anymore. I need to pack my bags and leave.
Ada wants me to get on medication. I told her I didn't want to be on their drugs and she says it's only to correct the imbalances in my brain. Living in society reminds me of why I dropped out. It's artificial and I can't handle it, knowing what I've learned in all my years free as a bird. I refuse to fall for the game like everyone else has. Living here makes me want to kill myself. I don't have the balls to kill myself though.
I went to the doctors to evaluate my disability situation. The tests the shrink gave me was telling me I did well at them, so I seriously doubt I'll get approved. Even if I did I wouldn't want to keep living here. It's sad, but being here enables me to do nothing. I am stuck going to bed at three or four and waking up at noon. I'm not blaming Ada, it's my own fault. I am ready to give up.
Very soon I plan to take off hitchhiking again and be homeless. First I'll be traveling north, because of the heat. I'm not going to rev up my mission again. My website expired and I did not renew it. No more world peace through marijuana for me. I failed. It never caught on like I expected it to. The shame I feel for stopping my mission is unbearable, but I've been off of it for nine months now, since last September when I came home. No one will believe my story now that I've been shot down for so long.
Everybody's brainwashed into believing in money and alas, I am alone in my ideals. A quote keeps running through my head, "It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society."
I feel trapped by money and have absolutely no interest in being a slave in this society. I need to be free again. I won't have my mission to fall back on. I'll leave my walking stick here. I'm dropping the act. I'm going to be just another bum. I'll still hit up the Mexican restaurants, but instead I'll ask if I can do some work for them instead. I'll live the last few years I have left free like I used to be. Like I miss being. I know the end is near for me. I rather die than succumb to the evil system everybody has been fooled into following.
Maybe I'll find me a nice homeless girl, but I doubt it. I'm stupid and have no skills. I've wasted my life away on a pipe dream. No sex though. The very last thing I want is to get some girl pregnant. I wouldn't be able to handle the responsibility.
I'd like to go back and talk to that medicine woman in Oregon again and see what she tells me. What she told me about the spirits saying I was a beam of light for others to follow and me bringing balance to the world was my main motivator for going out there and telling my story. She did tell me to never stop documenting my life, but I quit a while back. I'm not proud of my life like I used to be. Last time I was in Oregon she refused to talk to me, so I now doubt her. I think she might have just been telling me what I wanted to hear from the beginning.
I don't know if I'll smoke marijuana again. Lately when I've smoked I almost have an anxiety attack because it opens my mind and I dwell on my pathetic situation. Maybe once I'm free again I'll be able to enjoy it again. I don't know. I truly miss being happy.
The island paradises in Panama seem breathtaking, but even if I were to go I would still be expected to get a job and slave away. I just don't belong in society, anywhere. Plus, you have a new family to take care of.
My itching has subsided. Maybe I never had scabies to begin with. Maybe it was just an allergic reaction. Maybe it's stopped because I've been able to take a shower every day. I'm still using sulphur soap, which also dries out your skin and can cause itching itself. Maybe when I'm out on the road again and not showering every day the itch will return. I don't know. I really hate myself here.
Blessings,
- Victor Antonio
From: botanicogruber@hotmail.com
To: rightprotect@hotmail.com
Subject: Island Paradises of Panama
Date: Fri, 4 Jun 2010 16:53:06 -0500
Victor learn more about our islands, please Google Isla Grande, Contadora, or just Islands of Panama. Explore the geography of the world in internet as a hobby. Any place the energy is right for you will cure your depression and there you shall find reasons for existing.
Search and ye shall find, there is a place for everyone under the sun. Love & Peace, Frank
Hotmail has tools for the New Busy. Search, chat and e-mail from your inbox. Learn more.
The New Busy think 9 to 5 is a cute idea. Combine multiple calendars with Hotmail. Get busy.
The New Busy is not the too busy. Combine all your e-mail accounts with Hotmail. Get busy.
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