090305

 

Boulder, CO

Saturday September 3, 2005

     10:29pm  I am just sitting here on Pearl Street Mall. I just did like four laps around the mall holding my sign and getting awesome reactions from people. I was really hoping I would run into Hannah. See, today she showed up in the mall around three or four. It sucks not having a working tape recorder. Mine died a couple days ago. I got hooked up with a resinated pipe this morning and I was able to get all high off of resin. Resinated. Anyway, I stood at Hannah and I's meeting place all day patiently scanning the crowd for her. She finally showed up around three. I think I was surprised it took her that long, but she had to buy schoolbooks. We hung out in the mall for a bit then we went to our spot by the river to smoke. Later on we stopped and watched Chris and Amy do a fire poi show. Another Chris played a drum for them. We talked to Drum-Chris and his pregnant wife Laura. Hannah and Laura hit it off great. I was glad Hannah had made a friend. She seemed really relieved to have someone else to talk to besides me. She admits she's infatuated with me. We've been hanging out for like twenty days straight. She hasn't made any friends at all. Hannah has also been skipping school a lot and she just started her freshman year. Anyway, later on in the night Laura invited Hannah to smoke. I asked Hannah if I could tag along and she told me no. Actually, like after a week after we'd been hanging out I tried to break up with her. I had been spending all my time with her and not spreading my word. But damnit, she clung on to me and I couldn't say no to her and break her heart. Anyway, I just did some laps around the mall and saw Hannah again. They had gotten back from smoking and Hannah was sitting with them. I walked over and stood next to her. She didn't even look at me. I asked, "Did you have fun?" She either didn't hear me or ignored me. I asked again and she gave me some blank reply, "Yeah." She seemed very cold to me. I took that as a cue and just walked off holding my sign some more. I did another lap of the mall and she disappeared. I don't know what to think. It's already eelven nineteen. I am sitting down in front of the old Gap, our meeting spot. I am writing this hoping she thinks to come here. If she never shows I don't know what to think. Did her taste of freedom from me, since she made a friend, break her self-induced dependence from me, which she admitted she had? If we break up I will be sad, but it would also liberate me so I can work on my mission some more. I wonder what's going to happen.

     11:51pm  I was hungry. I asked this random guy for his leftovers and he hooked me up. Mmmm, nachos. I walked to the big wet boulder in the mall to eat my nachos. A couple people recognized me. Josh, some kid who's heard my story loaded my one-hitter for me. I'm thinking I'll walk back to campus, up the hill and catch the Buff Bus to the dorms and tell my story. Maybe Hannah will show up or come down from the dorms. I'm going to go now. After this cigarette.

     12:48am  I sped-walked to the college. Oh my lard, I just cannot stand the retards waiting for the Buff Bus. Lots of them recognized me. I jumped in with my presentation at the bus stop. They wouldn't even let me get past the mission objectives. I really thought college was supposed to be a center for higher learning. Little did I know.

     1:20am  I just got off the Buff Bus. That shit is just like highschool. College kids are so stupid.

     1:37am  I'm still out here in front of the dorms waiting for Hannah. Earlier, here at the dorms some kid recognized me. Someone I've told my story to. He had to go, but he said he would be back in fifteen minutes and that he would smoke me out. I think the Buff Bus runs until three. Hannah might be on one.

     2:31am  Hannah wasn't on the last Buff Bus. Actually, there's another one left which comes in 7.21 minutes. I really hope she's on it. If not I'll go crash at the church.

     3:01am  She wasn't on the last bus. I'm going to go crash out now. I hope my bag is safe in the shed I stashed it in.

Next day..