111903

 

Arcata, CA

Wednesday November 19, 2003

     2:38pm  Man, I haven't made any entries today. I woke up at Kati's and we had some good sex. I'm supposed to leave today. We both decided I should leave today. It's going to suck. My foot still hurts. It's these boots that are hurting my foot. They don't start to hurt until I put them on. It's weird it's just on my left.

                   Umm, I might be leaving today.

     10:06pm  Man, I've had a crazy day. I haven't made any entries. Dude, the worst shit happened. See, we had both decided today would be a good day for me to leave. I was just sitting on the couch and Kati came over and started kissing me. I thought for a second and told Kati, "How about one last romp in the hay before I leave?" She got this big grin and said, "Sure." So we went to the room and started groping. I put a condom on and we went at it. It was taking me a while to come, and we were changing positions. I kept checking the condom to be sure it hadn't slipped off. I even suggested we get a new condom, but Kati said, "It'll be ok." Kati came like two or three times and eventually I did. It was great.
                     As I dismounted and pulled out, Kati went to hold the condom while I pulled out. She went, "Uh-oh." I wasn't wearing the condom! Shit! It slipped off while we were having sex. I came inside of her. I flipped out. She jumped in the shower and I was all freaking out. Not only could she be pregnant now, but I'm still not sure I'm clean. I could never forgive myself if I got Kati sick. It would just kill me that if because of me, she had some STD.

                     I'm all broken up too about leaving. I'm going to miss Kati so much. I really do love this girl. Man, if I would've just left. None of this would have happened. Now we're all freaking out. Tomorrow, she's going to go to the clinic and get that morning-after pill to make sure she doesn't have a kid.
                     But man, what if I do have an STD? Then it started raining! I'm walking around and my left foot started hurting again! Shit. Bad stuff happened today and now I'm all worried about it. I told Kati, "I cannot leave today. Not just because it's raining. I don't want to leave you like this." Man, what a terrible day. I know I tell everyone that worrying is like paying interest on a debt you may never owe, but I think I have a reason to worry. We both do now. Kati had even said, "If I come up positive, you're coming back because you'll be the only person I'll be able to have sex with." She was just joking around, but this ain't no laughing matter. This is serious shit.

                     I've been hanging out at Kati's all day long. It's been one long lazy day. I didn't do shit today.

Next day..