Emails:
From :
"diana gruber" <dmgruber@hotmail.com>
To :
africa@laesa.com, alessandrocampus@virgilio.it, andrea.caciotti@tin.it, Solipsis61@hotmail.com, fonti.c@tiscalinet.it, gatoperez@hotmail.com, janemale@hotmail.com, jose.ramirez@gcserv.com, m_hoke@hotmail.com, rpearson@linklaters.com, rachel.pearson@linklaters.com, stefaniahall@hotmail.com, writeprotect@hotmail.com, Vsofia91@aol.com, zoudhini1@mmm.com, ziopiso@yahoo.com
Subject :
Have a great August
Date :
Fri, 02 Aug 2002 14:05:21 +0000
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Dear everyone,
I am going on vacation (finally!) for 3 weeks, and so will basically be off-line until 26 August.
I wish you all a wonderful month!
Love, Diana
PS - If anybody needs to contact me, these are my numbers:
home - +39-070/496749
cel - +39-349/3804241
(Around the dates of 6-13 August, I will be out of town at a friends house, so please use my cell. )
Again, love ya!!!! D
From :
"Chasity Rafferty" <solipsis61@hotmail.com>
To :
writeprotect@hotmail.com
Subject :
hello victor
Date :
Tue, 13 Aug 2002 01:09:18 +0000
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Hi Victor-
I just wanted to write and hopefully see how you are doing. I noticed that you sent out an email, so I am hoping that you have internet access, at least once in a while.
I'm doing really good. I hope that you are also. I noticed in your letter that you are unhappy in the hospital. It is my opinion, that the hospital is the best place for you. Not really at the moment because you won't recognize your problems and take advantage of the opportunity that you have to get better. I really, REALLY don't think that you are crazy, or insane. I believe that you are manic-depressive. Your mom and maybe your social worker seem to think that you are somewhat schizophrenic. I know that you know that I have no psychological training but I have researched your particular symptoms and have drawn an educated conclusion. Anyway, I'm not writing to get you to do anything or change your behavior. I just want you to know that this is what I think. I have read letters from your father and you seem to have many of the same thought processes and rules of logic, it seems an indication of something.
The only thing that I want you to know about me, Victor, is that I care about you. I hate the fact that you are fighting everyday to maintain your equilibrium, your state of mind. I am totally a person who understands your reluctance to use medication as a means to be assimilated into what other people think that you should be. When you had the movie "A beautiful mind" did you watch it? It is about a highly, highly intelligent man who is schizophrenic. It is not even realized that he is, until his 30s. This man has a rough, terrible time coping with his life. Having to realize what is real and what his mind is fabricating. It is a true story and the man goes on to eventually win the nobel peace prize for an astounding economic theory. He is a very old man when he does this. He learns to recognize his illness and he overcomes it, completely with his own will. He refuses to take medication and he does whatever he has to do, to prove to himself certain realities. Now I know that this doesn't completly apply to you because you of course are not a severe case like this. I want you to just consider the possiblity that you may have manic depression. I invite you to use your own skills of reason and logic and research it on your own. To please try to use an unbiased mind to learn why your life has taken the route that it has. Do you feel like your life has been taken out of your own control? I hope you do because that is the reality. You are in a place that you don't want to be, doing things that you don't want to do. I hate that. Its not right. I want you to have your own life back. Free. More than anything else, I want you out of there. I want to know that you are out there, living your life and doing what makes you happy without hurting other people or at the expense of other people.
Just know that you can trust me Victor, I've always said that I would not turn my back on you. If you feel like I'm not being supportive you are wrong. Its hard for me to relate to you now because you are a very different person, that doesn't mean that I have forgotten that I used to love you and that somewhere in your head that person is still there. I don't want you to be the old Victor, I want you to be an independent, self-reliant, happy Victor. Thats all I want for you. I really hope that it happens one day. The whole thing however, is out of my hands. As I said before this is only my opinion and you may not value it, I understand that.
On a totally different subject, I'll tell you the new developments in my life. I am going to Florida for 5 days. I leave Wed. August 14th. I'm going to hang out with my Dad and Carol but I'm also going to check the place out and see if I want to live there. Its about 90% decided in my mind that I am going to move there regardless. There is no reason for me not to, and I really want to. I probably won't move until next year, sometime after Christmas. I'm really happy with myself and my life and I feel comfortable with what I'm doing and where I'm going. I'd love it if I knew you were doing the same. You were one of the most influential people in my life. You helped me grow and develop into who I am now. You made me less afraid and you have taken care of me in times when I could not take care of myself. I don't take those things lightly and I don't forget. Please trust me, Victor, please know that I only wish you the best and the happiness that you deserve. i have no ulterior motives. I love you. I love you as if you were a member of my family, its that kind of bond. I may not always be able to give you what you want as far as seeing your point of view, but I will always act out of concern for your well-being.
I hope you got something positive out of this letter. If not, please try to because thats how I meant it. I think about you, I haven't forgotten you but I am no position to get you out of this situation. You have known all along that YOU have to do that. Explore all your options, even the ones you think don't apply to you.
-Chasity
From :
"Chasity Rafferty" <solipsis61@hotmail.com>
To :
writeprotect@hotmail.com
Subject :
Re: high chasity :]
Date :
Wed, 21 Aug 2002 22:43:14 +0000
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Hey Victor-
Well, I'm home from Florida already. I got back on Tuesday. As for any plans for the future as far as you staying here or anything, I think we'll have to talk face to face about that.
I know your mom is under the assumption that you will be living with her. She is in contact with someone at the hospital and that person is under the same assumption, which I gathered was a condition of your release. As you may already know, Laura and Carlitos are also living there so its a full house already. I know its not ideal conditions for you to be in. I really wouldn't mind you staying here if you were working and paying rent and bills and all that, but like I said its a conversation we'll have to have.
Stuart is fine, he had fun staying with my mom while I was in Florida. He likes to chase the cats that come around her house. He's a little shaggy. I shaved him last month but of ocurse it grew back. He misses you, I can tell. I got him this little stuffed dog from Pottery Barn. Its a tiny pink dog that he could rip to shreds in a second but he has really taken to it. He likes to carry it around and make me throw it. He has even slept with it a few times, its cute.
I'm glad you'll be released soon and I'll look forward to seeing you on Thursday or Friday. I'm working full days so I don't get off until 4pm. I hope to see you soon.
-Chasity
From :
Rainbwluv@aol.com
To :
writeprotect@hotmail.com
Subject :
Re: my story, part 1
Date :
Sat, 31 Aug 2002 21:18:55 EDT
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Its totally awesome. Im a writer too.
would love to recieve more.
How did you find me?
byebye
Becky!
#sanantonio
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